I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
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