okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I deserve this hangover.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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