To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
