She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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