Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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