my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize