So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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