Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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