I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
