Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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