so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
