Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Randomize
