Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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