Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
