You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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