Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
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