idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
