Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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