I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
