the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Randomize
