Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
