New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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