after a month anything with tits is on the radar
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
