You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
