so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
