I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Randomize
