she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
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