who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
