with your own penis?
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
