You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
