Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Never joke about your clitoris.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
