Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
