Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Damn victory sex feels great
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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