well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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