Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Randomize
