I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Duck Duck Cougar?
i would punch a child for taco bell
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
