smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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