Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
