I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
