Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
