Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
