shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
