So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
