the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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