I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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