why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
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