I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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