it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
