I want to stick my p in your. b.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Is it penis luge time yet?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
