My friends, they love my intelligence
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize
